What is the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear the phrase “have it all?”
What emotions come to the surface?
When I think about the term “have it all” I have mixed feelings. On the one hand, it feels restrictive because there is a strong undertone that sacrifice is required to “have it all,” and it feels like a mockery because our industry is demanding and unpredictable. At times, it feels like we are expected to sacrifice our health, time, and family obligations, all in the name of building a successful practice.
On the other hand, it feels freeing because there is a shift in the professional world where people are creating for themselves a freedom-based lifestyle that places a high value on work-life balance, self-care, and self-exploration. Women are changing the conversation. We are no longer required to hold ourselves hostage to old-school business practices where our opinions were unheard and dismissed.
We live in an age where we have a voice and platform to do business our way—to define what it really means to have it “all.”
What does “all” look like for you, specifically?
This can be a big debate for women. We want to think we live in an equal world, but women tend to be pigeon-held to all of our roles and made to feel guilty for being ambitious. Men don’t get asked if they can have it all. It is just assumed that they can.
So how do you manage in a double-standard-world? Do you lean in? Do you bust out your Superwoman cape? Or do you feel defeated and shrink back into roles that don’t reflect your vision for your life?
Or, like me, do you find even these models chafe?
I believe there is a way to master being a mom, wife, friend, daughter and businesswoman, if you are willing to shift the way you think about what it means to have it all.
You see, the biggest issue with “all” is we mistaking having it with doing it. As high-achieving women, somehow, we have bought into the idea that our worth is equated with our doing not our simply being. We’ve decided that to have it, we must do, do, do.
No wonder we have created a nation of overworked, overwhelmed and underpaid women!
Ladies, I invite you to drop the to-do list, stop saying “yes” to everyone else’s vision of your life, and start thinking strategically about what you truly want for yourself, your family and your business, and how you can create more without being the doer of every. little. stinking. thing.
You aren’t required to be everything for everybody. You take that on yourself. Your life isn’t set up that way. You set it up that way.
It all boils down to choice and perspective. You hold the power.
What if instead of choosing this or that, you chose both. Or all.
What if you choose: a comfortable lifestyle where your bills are paid in full and on time, vacations of a lifetime, flex working days so that you don’t miss family events, and an active social life where you aren’t glued to your work 24-7?
Or maybe that’s not you. Maybe you want to choose living in an RV in Arizona and collecting rocks while you watch the sun set on the horizon. Or generating seven figures a year in revenue while working only three or four days a week. Or working only with clients your love or on matters about which you are passionate.
Having it all for me means that I live a stress-reduced life. My business growth is predictable because I have systems in place and my business isn’t 100% dependent on me to run it. I have a team to do the things I deem less desirable, and I get to give my clients my undivided attention when I am with them. I get to nurture my creative juices on demand. I don’t have to tuck away my creativity because I have too many pressing issues pulling me. If you read my last lesson, then you know it has taken years for me to get here, so I don’t say this lightly. I learned a lot of lessons the hard way, and I want to save you the time and struggle if you are open to my help.
If you are looking to build a high-impact, high-revenue generating practice that supports you in the lifestyle of your choice, you will need a solid plan, a map to your firm’s growth and sustainability. Let’s take a moment to flesh out what “having it all” might look like for you and how you can create more of what you truly desire for yourself.
We are in the heart of planning season, so I think now is a great time to revisit your goals and make sure your actions are in alignment with creating a business you love and one that supports your personal goals.
I have compiled six actions steps to help you get started. Please grab a pen and piece of paper and work through them.
Step 1: Define what “all” is for you, specifically. Be honest. Don’t guard your desires and don’t worry about the how. Own up to what you really want. I am giving you permission to throw all the rules out the door for now.
Step 2: Prioritize your needs and desires (take care of yourself mentally, emotionally, physically, financially, spiritually because you cannot pour from an empty vessel). Write down what an ideal day, month, and year would look like if money were not an issue.
Step 3: Write down your goals and create a strategy for implementing them
Step 4: Calendar your top priorities first. And then ask yourself: “Who can take other, less important tasks off my plate so I can focus on my top priorities?”
Step 5: Choose to function in a proactive mode v. reactive mode. You can choose to reflect upon this at the start of each day or the conclusion, but it is important for you to create space to evaluate your progress or lack thereof and then create a plan to course correct. And remember: every time you react you are acting according to someone else’s priorities, not your own.
Step 6: Write down the one thing you struggled to get done all year. What was that one goal or task that got the best of you? Decide if it is worth bringing over to the new year or decide to let it go and replace it with something that is more attainable.
It is possible for you to create all you desire but, to do so, you may be required to shift your perspective. If you are open to new ways of managing and growing your business while staying true to your core values, then I think we should chat.Click here to get started.